Breaking News: Supreme Court Rules DOMA Unconstitutional... and I Still Can't Even Get a Date

photo by Andrew Burton/Getty Images

Today's Supreme Court ruling that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional by a 5-4 vote grants same-sex couples the same legal rights and benefits awarded to their heterosexual counterparts on a federal level, and throws out California's Proposition 8 straight out of the window. This not only marks a pivotal point in our nation's history, but will also make it exponentially more difficult for me to find a husband now that all of the good ones are going to start pairing up and getting hitched. Social media networks exploded with glee over the news this morning and I am still misty eyed and ready to agree to the next person who proposes to me.


Two years ago New York City passed the marriage equality bill the day before gay pride weekend, inciting both tears of joy and the heavy consumption of alcohol to celebrate. My ex-boyfriend even called me from California to congratulate my hard work - I had been working as a lobbyist that summer to pass the bill - and ask for my hand in marriage. I accepted the former, but hung up my phone on him at the latter request. Upon hearing the news of the federal bill this morning, he made his second attempt and I allowed history to repeat itself by turning him down once again.

Friends, family, and loved ones continue to celebrate, with those closest to me trying to convince me to leave work early to join them for a cocktail or seven. Instead I joined the hordes of Tweeps on Twitter and began cataloging my thoughts our the recent advancement in history alongside Chi Chi LaRue, Sister Roma, Conner Habib, and Joan Rivers - who really had the winning tweet of the day.

The ruling could not have come at a better time, just days before New York City Pride, and as we gear up to celebrate a little early - let us not forget those who have those who continue to lead us toward positive, progressive change. Thank you.

Now where's Michele Bachman? Drinks are on her tonight! Maybe we can stop by Chick-Fil-A on the way to the gay bars; maybe they'll have a Gay Pride special, or something.